la isla d'lisa: Um, You're the President ...

... of the United States.

Think before you speak!

Sheesh.

scattered thoughts that caught my fancy

I want something comfortable, but I want to look cool - Kiefer Sutherland (re motorcycles)

Laughter, like love, has power to survive the worst things life has to offer, and to do it with style - Jim Butcher

Let not mankind bogart love - Willie Nelson

Happiness is a journey, not a destination - Father Alfred D’Souza

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts - Winston Churchill

All that is necessary for evil to succeed is that good men do nothing - Edmund Burke

Step up, or step aside - Christopher Titus

We ask for strength and God gives us difficulties, which makes us strong. We pray for wisdom and God sends us problems, the solution of which develops wisdom. We plead for prosperity and God gives us brain and brawn to work. We plead for courage and God gives us dangers to overcome. We ask for favors and God gives us opportunities. This is the answer - Hugh B. Brown

This is why I'm pudgy, this is why I'm awkward. This is why, this is why, this is why I'm p'awkward. - Mike Birbiglia

Never doubt that a small group of committed individuals can make a difference, and indeed it is the only thing that ever has - Margaret Mead

One of the most difficult moments in anyone's life is when the fog of childhood lifts and we see, for the first time, our parents as people. - Mary Shannon ("In Plain Sight")

You must be the change you wish to see in the world. - Mahatma Gandhi

I'm just a guy trying to raise some kids - John Deppen

Tomorrow. The cause of ... and solution to ... all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

the blessing way

May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face; the rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand - Traditional Gaelic Blessing

May the warm winds of Heaven blow softly upon your home, may the Great Spirit bless all who enter there. May your moccasins make happy tracks in many snows, may the rainbow always touch your shoulder - Cherokee Prayer Blessing

All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well - Julian of Norwich

sometimes i laugh so hard at jake i almost wet myself

10/02/25 "Because the internet is a never ending cavalcade of idiocy." (Johnny, in discussion w/Bobby Slayton & Chris Hardwick re 'Web Soup')
10/02/03 "Except being near a school is like walking up to kryptonite ... drop to your knees, 'Arrrgh, EDUCAAAAAATION!'" re UMKC frat asking Johnny to come judge a contest.
09/12/08 "She said my Mom's gonna get 4 inches ... go Dad!" (Johnny, re Carrie's advised snowfall expectation at his parent's house)
09/12/05 "It's the sexual mafia. It's the infidelity cosa nostra." Why Grubbs will never bag another star whereas Uchitel will, because she denied all.
09/12/02 "Tell me how it looks from the hotel." To Johnny upon learning part of acclimating for climbing Peru's Machu Picchu is two days booze-free.
09/11/03 "He should do a spin-off; call it, 'My Penis and Why it's So Happy'." (re Dr. Travis Stork and his pathetic little post magna-cum-laude-graduating, Bachelor-Parising, the-Doctors-hosting, Carrie-Underwood-dating life)
09/09/09 "I am a blessed human being." (guest Tommy Chong)
09/09/02 "You're not supposed to hear ANYTHING outside that room." Whispering, "You hear EVERYTHING outside that room!" Talking about when Johnny and Greg throw down in the sound booth like animals ... er, brothers.
09/08/06 "I ain’t mad at anybody but if you’re gonna go, GO! Don’t miss Heaven by an inch." (Johnny, doing the show from Sturgis this week)
09/07/14 "That's 'Leviticus', not 'Leviathan'." Mutters, "Aliens vs. Predators." re Johnny's reading of an e-mail received in reference to yesterday's conversation with Pastor Traut on his part in the flick "Bruno".
09/05/21 "Yeah! He runs like he's CHASED!" re speed of old bald man jogging by the station, ass-out, in black short-shorts.
09/05/14 "I paid big jet money and got a little prop plane!" Picking on Johnny's flight story woes.
09/04/28 "It's always funnier when you sing it." re Coogan's sing-song slam of Johnny.
09/04/16 "It seems like a joke until they’re awesome!" When talking about mock-rock supergroup Steel Panther.
09/03/18 "Sometimes I watch movies and think how fun it would be to be in them." Responding to Coogan, having spent two minutes in Anchorman.